The Uncensored Misconceptions of Legacy!

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The Uncensored Misconceptions of Legacy!

Sean Joyce

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My name’s Sean and next year, you’ll have the pleasure of seeing me at Legacy! I’m currently at Simle Middle School, and two years ago, I was in the newspaper club. The teacher running that ended up leaving us so then, the next year in 7th grade, I wanted to fill that deep depressing void. I rebooted the newspaper club in 8th grade, which I’m currently enrolled in. This year has been known as “The Year of the Student Voices” as Simle has had more school spirit this year than any other school year before.  Although, it was more like the year of politics for the rest of the US.

Legacy is cool… I think. I’ve never gone to school there, and neither has anyone at Simle. As uninformed people make uninformed decisions, many misconceptions have been traveling around the halls of Simle, none of which I have heard. This is because I have no friends. However, seeing as I like publicity, I went to interview six students from our Simle newspaper club. I asked them for their thoughts on Legacy High School. Unfortunately, the faint of heart may want to cover their eyes and plug their ears, as these are…

The Uncensored Misconceptions of Legacy!

Unfortunately, after reading your paper’s “Questions with Stupid Answers” section, I believed that Simle’s students would be as big of smart-alecs as yours. Unfortunately, it seems that puberty is the only way for humans to develop extremely stale, dry humor, and seeing that 70% of the Simle population is under 5’4”, I will not be receiving any Airplane!-esque humor. So instead, here are…

The Serious Questions Simle Students Have for Legacy High School Students!

You can almost hear the party balloons deflating from here. I’ve asked around 15 for things they would like to know about Legacy High School. Their answers ranged from “How safe is Legacy?” to, and I quote, “Legacy Saber Poop hehe” So, I’ve painstakingly narrowed these answers down to just 12 questions that Simle students have for Legacy. For the answers to these tough questions, I’ve asked Margaret Bjelanovic, a freshman at Legacy for her opinion on the matter.


Zachary Weiand (8th)

  1. If I graduate, do I get a minor or master’s degree?
    1. You’re gonna be lucky if you manage to get your high school diploma.
  2. How does the schedule work?
    1. In order to make room for more electives, our day is chunked into 20 min mods. A class can be anywhere from 2 to 4 mods long depending on the day. It’s also kinda nice because we get some variety in our schedule instead of the same exact thing every day.


Aleisha Schock (8th)

  1. Do the planes take off from inside or outside?
    1. Joke’s on you, we have landing strips on the roof.
  2. Is Saber Time assigned all four years?
    1. Freshmen year is the only year that everyone has mandatory saber time. After that, it’s based on your individual grades.

Katarina Chap (8th)

  1. Do you actually have Sabers?
    1. Ever wonder why we have so many biology rooms? (Not to mention the kitchens…..)
  2. How do you work career academy classes into the schedules?
    1. All I know is that those classes take a huge portion out of your schedule and limits the amount of electives you can take, just because of the time it takes to bus you up there.

Bristol Kelley (6th)

  1. When do senior discounts apply in the store?
    1. Do I look like a senior?
  2. What is Saber Time?
    1. Saber time is basically like a study hall that they use to fill in the odd spots in your schedule and help give you time to get your homework done.

Tim Kadrmas (6th)

  1. What hours can I call in to order my Amazon Prime package?
    1. If you follow the secret underground tunnels far enough, they’ll lead you right to Amazon headquarters. No need to call.
  2. How many sports can I play?
    1. ALL OF THEM.


As you can see, Legacy High is very similar to Simle. They have our old students and their humor, even if a little more dry. They are us, just after puberty. If you have any other questions for Legacy students send them to us at the Golden Scroll and we’ll get your answers as soon as we can.

When you arrived at Simle, you yourself may have thought that this school would be your metaphorical deathbed. As you, whether a Saber or a Spartan, have already survived between 1-3 years at Simle, you’ve seen what it can do. Those who don’t know history are doomed to repeat it, so if you can learn what the previous generations have done to make or break our school environment, you’ll be able to solve the former problems. The next chapter will begin, the restaurant of life will switch from the breakfast to the lunch menu, and we will all succeed. First elementary, then middle and high school, and for many of us, college. If you’re anything like me, you just try to make people happy. Good luck!

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